Saturday, March 26, 2011

That's Enough About Work

That's what T said to me 5 weeks ago at my first "adjusted" session, "That's enough about work, what about you?"

Okay, first, my usual sessions were Mondays at 4 p.m. The first adjusted session was that day on a Saturday afternoon (I don't even remember the time). I had just spent nearly an hour talking about Coworker (read about her here. And here). Things with her are forever repeating. That sound monotonous, and it is, but it's also tiring and aggravating. Something had set her off again the week before my session and she was making me nuts! So, I was talking about it with T when all of a sudden, he says, "That's enough about work, what about you?"

What? That was about me. I looked up at him and replied, "But work is all there is. That's all I do."

And for the love of Pete, he looked at me and said, "Oh come on, there has to be more than that."
Note: at my last session, Mr.S DID finally ask about what was going on at work.

Well, Mr.S, no, there isn't more. That's all I have - and you know it. I understand your life is overflowing with duties, activities, family, a new job, etc. But I have precious little to occupy my time outside of work.

I'm not an ambitious person, so I'm not in clubs or organized religions (don't like 'em). I don't have much to do with my family anymore (too much water under the bridge), nor do I have a huge friend base. My work is my life right now and I was trying to get some advice on how to handle Coworker.

I guess not all sessions are worth the time.  ...


Grace said...

(((Ivory))) You spend a lot of time at work and I think it's fair that work is about "you". I've read about your dealings with your frustrated co-worker in the past. Urgh! I'm curious as to what Mr S said after you said work WAS about you.
I'm sorry your session was frustrating for you.

Bee said...

My T does this sometimes. I'll be talking about school or work for a good chunk of time and then she'll just stop me and say we need to talk about "more important things". So school and work can't be important? It's basically my whole life so I translate that statement to "the things [I] do are not important".

I'm sorry your T brushed you off. It's hard enough making the transition to a new time and place, but to feel like you're not worth the time is awful.

Ivory said...

Grace, it was, well, it embarrassed me. I was very surprised. After I said that work was all I had, he said, "Oh, no, there has to be more than that." He wasn't being smart, he felt sorry for me, I think - which made me feel pitiful.

Bee, I did feel like I was taking up time and space I had no right to and I felt ashamed. I didn't need that.

Just Be Real said...

That comment would jar me too. I know that my t. will steer me into the right direction on the same topic, but to change the topic all together. That is kind of abrupt.

Paul from Mind Parts said...

Maybe T is trying to help you learn to balance. Many people can do "all work". I'm not sure if you are DID that it's so good. I'm just not sure.

castorgirl said...

Work is all I have too Ivory. I feel like a freak when people ask me about friends etc, because I have none. I'm sorry Mr S. said that. Work is important. I sometimes think that if I can manage work better, then other things might balance out.

Take care,

Ivory said...

JBR - yes, the comment he made was way too abrupt. At first, I thot I'd been switching and didn't notice that other things were said, but the time was not off.

Paul - I really think it's because I'm DID that I have not reached out to "friends" like I used to do. I'm efficient at work because of my DID, but it also prevents me from doing other things. :(

Castorgirl - Me, too! (feeling like a freak!) I am very social at work, but as soon as I clock out, I'm an introvert - coworkers have a hard time understanding that behavior. Me, too, actually.

Just Be Real said...

Came back by to give you a safe hug dear one. Thinking about you.