Michael: Houston has not yet found a solution!
Well, at least the weeds are dying!! Yippie!
The thing with my mother is still looming over me like a big bad bubble of gas. She was hyped up and excited on the phone when she told me that she was going to hold a family meeting. Lord, put me in a coma till it's over.
When I asked her why the meeting, she said because she's sick and tired of all of us sneaking around bad-mouthing each other and not acting like a family should. WHOA!? What?
I haven't talked to 4 of my siblings since just before my dad died, 5 years ago. I had to distance myself and find a way to heal on my own because they found fault and constantly ridiculed me because I'm different - and they don't even know about the DID. So, I know it's not me she was referring to, exactly. I explained to her many times that I didn't want to push them all away, I just needed to take a step out of their lives because I need boundaries and they don't respect boundaries.
So, off Mom goes telling me that we are going to clean it all up and start acting like a family again. I tried to tell her that I'm proud of her that she is taking a positive step forward for a change but that she can't expect to heal in just one afternoon what's been brewing and bubbling for at least 20 years.
I don't think I've been found out, yet. I will know if I eventually am. I dying to tell you all something but can't untill I'm A B S O L U T L E Y 100 percent SURE I haven't been found out. If I spoke up and then was found out, she would know for sure it's me, by what I would tell you. Dang, i'm rambling.
I claimed a Dr. appointment today at work and went to my therapist. That helped a lot. I'm more calm and centered than I was. You see, I can tell him all the stuff I'm dying to tell you all! Oh, life can be so complicated!
So, anyway, that's where things are for now.