There are similarities and great differences between dreams/nightmares of multiples and those who are not multiple. I thot about listing them, but it becomes frustrating. Instead, I want to address the nightmare from my last post: Dreaming the Nightmare.
This is not the first time I've had nightmares such as this one. I've had them all my life though it wasn't until the last 5 years that I've experienced first hand what they mean and what it means to ignore them and/or try to decipher them. They are a double-edged sword.
All weekend, I've been waiting for the follow-up nightmare. It will come. It will tell me what it wants me to know. It will tell me something I don't care to know. Which ever choice I make in trying to decide how to proceed upon waking becomes a juggernaut, running up and over me in an instant, after following me around for days, even weeks. I freak every time this begins, I can't help it.
The outcome will be the same. It's always the same. First, I dream bits and pieces of a memory I don't know is mine. With each passing day/night, I begin to feel part of the dream as if I'm an extension of it, somehow. Soon, I can't distinguish reality between an ethereal dream and a memory. All the while, I am spending the days completely confused and feeling a pitiful mess. I will do things I know are wrong but unable to process through them. My waking hours will be shrouded in a fog of fear and panic; my nights buried in heart-stopping terror.
Finally, I will full out remember something from my past that tells me I'm damaged and broken; it tells me I was terrified of dying, believing I did die. I will want to die - I never do. I will spend weeks, even months, so ashamed and embarrassed of what I remember happened to me as a child I won't be able to get through a day without becoming dreadfully awash in depression. I will hate my life. I will wish I was still dreaming. I will know I'm not.
In a multiple's life, dreams quite often come true - or rather, they were true before they were a dream...