Tuesday, May 19, 2009


I didn't mean for anyone to get the wrong idea about Mr. S. I wish every one of you could spend a few sessions with him.

I appreciate Thesamesky for questioning whether I can get angry with T and confront him. I couldn't for a couple of years, but he would never have said what he did yesterday, either. Now, tho, I actually don't feel the need to be angry with him anymore. We have a great client/T relationship. It may take a week or two to bring something up, or sometimes I call/email as soon as I get home, but I have learned to share my fears and concerns with him - I don't often have to get angry to fix something. AND he is always gracious and understanding.

Then there is my daughter. She and Mr. S have an agreement with me that allows them to discuss me/my therapy. My daughter has no problem getting all up in his face, tho she hasn't ever done it - no need. They have a good relationship, too, she believes in his ability to . So believe me that I wasn't being mistreated.

Sorry Mr. S! I didn't mean to give the wrong impression.



Kate said...

Hi Ivory,

He sounds like a good t to you.

I'm glad that you have that.


thesamesky said...

Oops ... sorry I go the wrong end of the stick Ivory! I'm probably too caught up in my own need to express anger at my therapist and wasn't properly listening to you. :(

I'm glad that you and Mr S have such a good relationship. It sounds brilliant! :)

Ivory said...


No need to apologize - I'm glad you questioned it. That's why I love blogging. It has brought some outside opinions and input to my situation that, otherwise, I would have missed totally. And, I would have missed it in a way that I would miss the experience of growing from it like I never thot I could.

I don't always show physically that I'm angry, but I have learned to tell T that I am angry. Just telling him I'm angry helps me to sound angry, too, and say what it is I'm angry about.

I hope it gets easier for you. Thanks again for taking the time to care and question.


Ivory said...


He is very good. What I appreciate most is that he has never threatened to pass me off to someone else - which I've heard happens often with DIDs. He'll be the first to admit when he thinks he's made a mistake, and then he fixes it, if it's possible.

Early on in my therapy, he had given me the option for him to refer me to a more experienced therapist and said something like, "Or, I'll strap on my seat belt and we'll will go thru this together." Gotta love it. He has done just that.


Kate said...

Hi Ivory,

I love that he said that to you. That is so great that he was committed to seeing you through. Having someone on our side who is there for us is half the battle in therapy.

Good and healing thoughts to you.


castorgirl said...

It does sound like you've got a great relationship with Mr S :)

Often the test can be not only those really dark moments, but when you're trying to bring some humour into the situation - whether it be ironic, hopeful, sarcastic, avoiding or whatever. If the T can sense what is needed, then that's great...

Take care :)

Ivory said...


My T has said almost the exact same thing as your comment! It's half the battle.

Thanks for stopping by! Have a great day!


Glad to see you're back!

Yes, Mr.S is very perceptive, but then, like I said, he wants my therapy to work and he tells me he is committed to helping me.

He likes dark humor and sometimes he pulls out laughs about being DID, but he would never make a joke if he didn't think I was up for it.


Marie said...

Hi, Ivory -

Well, I finally did it! I finally got all the little kinks and bugs worked out on my blog and I finally have some time with which I can start following other blogs.

So, naturally, I wanted to come over and check out YOUR blog! I really, really, REALLY love the colors! How cool!

You are really a talented writer! Very honest . . you allow the rest of us to feel very connected with you -- supported, part of a compassionate community. Thank you.

I look forward to reading more in the future!
- Marie (Coming Out of the Trees)

Ivory said...


Great! I'll see you here sometimes, then.

Thank you much for the compliments. I have always wanted to be a writer - of anything. Everyone I know tells me they love my writing.

I was an atypical student in college, in that I could have been everyone's mother. One day I received a most profound compliment from a boy who was less than half my age. We were sectioned off in groups and he suddenly raised his hand and asked if he could trade someone and be in my group. When the professor asked him why, he said, "because I like to listen to her talk and because the way she writes, she could describe an old wooden chair in a way that would make anyone want to make love to it." I was so embarrassed.

He was put in my group.

Glad you will be coming back, I enjoy reading about you, too!